So there's a real thing called Eighth Grade Graduation. We thought it was a myth, like kids who clean their own room without being asked to...
The Graduate … of Eighth Grade!
MojoFiction Does His Civic Duty
On Monday, we here at MojoFiction read on the internet that Tuesday was voting day for Republicans and Wednesday was for Democrats. You can’t believe everything you read on the internet! On Tuesday morning we thought we better be sure, so we did the smart thing and turned to the most reliable information source we... Continue Reading →
2017 Reviewed!
2017 is officially in the rearview mirror, which means it’s that time of year again, when the underworked and overpaid staff here at MojoFiction answer important questions from our readers about things and stuff that happened in the past year. Questions ranged across many subject matters, so we picked the best of the best. On... Continue Reading →
MojoFiction Judges America (or tries to)
Recently, the upstanding citizens at MojoFiction received a notice calling us in for Jury duty. Obviously, someone didn’t think that through, what with our recent performance serving on the parole board for O.J. Simpson: O.J.’s Lawyer: “As you can see, when he’s not committing violent crimes, my client is a model prisoner and all... Continue Reading →
A Night on Blizzard Mountain, and Other Useless Information
Welcome to MojoFiction’s compendium of the top 10 stories you won’t find on Reddit (or wherever young people hang out on the internet because we’re cool like they are). We’ve curated our list to keep up with the importantly useless topics of the past few weeks. All 10 of them. Recently, Stephen Colbert made us... Continue Reading →
Your Mission, Should You Choose to Accept It…
As you know, MojoFiction is not a secret government agency conducting covert domestic counterintelligence. So, if anyone asks if you know any secret government agencies, make sure you reply, “Definitely not MojoFiction.” Anyway, just before the beginning of the school year, the highly placed secret agents here at MojoFiction took a break from our covert... Continue Reading →
Starved Rock: Taking Sibling Rivalry to a New Level
You can’t show weakness in front of your brother. You just can’t. Sibling rivalry never ends. Ever. You must always win. And then text everyone in the family telling them about your win. MojoFiction: “Look, Mom, I finished my pizza first.” Mom: “You’re 40.” MojoFiction: “…What’s your point?” Mom: “Stop texting me. And when are... Continue Reading →
The One Ring of Love – A Cautionary Engagement Tale
Legend tells of a great ring of immense power and dark beauty that calls out its siren song to unsuspecting victims. The reach of this powerful object knows no bounds, instilling in men an unrelenting compulsion to possess it, regardless of cost (but it should cost). This compulsion usually arrives around the same time a... Continue Reading →
People Magazine Accidentally Doesn’t Select MojoFiction
People magazine just released their “Most Beautiful Women of the Year.” Once again MojoFiction is not on the list, leading us to believe that People magazine continues to assume our gender. Our super-manly, beer-chugging, steak-eating, cigar chomping gender. Shame on you, People. Did we assume that “People” only meant human people? No. We are more... Continue Reading →
MojoFiction’s Inconvenient Hairline
Recently, the staff here at MojoFiction heard about this newfangled thing called global warming, which came as a total surprise to us as we gunned our Hummer down Interstate 90 on our way to visit our stock broker to ask about the performance of our oil and gas stock. See, we hadn't been paying attention... Continue Reading →
MojoFiction 